I got to Mass nice and early a half hour to prepare for things in the dark. I love this time so much. I heard loud noises in the dark and discovered it was the monastery cat banging about and she came over to say hello. She sat on my lap and I petted her having grown very fond of cats recently. Then the young novice nun came in and tried and failed to chase the creature out and failed. This made me laugh. Anyway it got time for the priest to go on the altar and it suddenly struck me I had been there for half an hour and it might have been I had been in Church for all that time and given zero time to God (although true I had read a chapter of Luke, the Passion Narrative). But prayer can be like this. We can be like little birds trying to fly and just don't seem to get to take off. It does require discipline. But maybe at least trying God may take it to be as good as succeeding. I love to watch the Advent candles at the moment. To count them. Maybe what seems like small things are really great ones.
Such a beautiful thread! I like to have a mental picture in my mind when i look at priest offering the Mass of Our Lady, the saints, poir souls in Purgatory and all the choirs of angels with him. And as He raises the Bread and Chalice to know Christ is truly Present! On those days where i let my worries or troubles cloud me from that moment I think how stupid of me to miss it. But even in my human frailties and distractions , I know all of this happens at every Mass and we still receive grace.
St Tereasa of Avila said that when we look back from heaven our entire life will look like a night spent in a bad hotel . The exceptions to this, I believe will be the Holy Masses that we attended. Far from fading in our memories these will like a rich wine deepen and become brighter in our hearts. Shining like beacons. It is by guess too that in the end we will not see them as many Masses but the one Mass. For at the end of the day there is only the one Eternal and Infinite Mass. We just happen at different times to enter this one Mass through different doors. But it will be truly wonderful in heaven to see us entering all these doors on Earth. It the angels could be guilty of envy, they would envy us this.
