A sweet lady who lives out of her car On Monday morning, one of the monks came to notify me that last night he was approached by an older woman in our church. She wanted to know if it was OK to sleep in her car, in our parking lot. We do get a request like that a few times a year from people who simply want to stay in their car. It is not something we like to give permission for because of legal considerations. However, at times it does happen. When I returned from my trip with my brother for his VA appointment, I was told by Pattie that the lady was back and in the retreat house parking lot. I thought I knew her because of the description given to me by the community member who met her. The monk knew her family, but not her and knew that she had some mental health issues. The family members all tried to help her, but in the end, it was too much. So she has been homeless off and on for years. She refuses help with her problem, she denies she has one. I was not very happy with this development because dealing with certain people can be tricky. I was in the retreat house office around 4 PM when I heard a car pull up and park right outside the office window. When I looked out I could see that it was the person in question. As I watched her, I prayed for the wisdom to be able to be used by the Lord in a way that would not cause the woman difficulty. I went to the church to prepare the books we use for vespers, in the section reserved for our guests. I did the books and saw that the woman was in the church, seated up front. The church was empty, so I took that as a good time to talk to her. As I walked towards her, I remember her being here about a year ago. I say down and reintroduced myself to her. She was a very gentle looking woman, small, tired and anxious, and seemed to have lost some weight. I asked her a few pointed questions. I let her know that we do not really like people sleeping in our parking lot. I then asked her if she would like a room, which she readily said yes too. I was relieved about that. So I asked her to accompany me over to the retreat house so we could arrange a room for her. At the time, we had room for another quest. So I got her settled in and went over some things that need to be told to our guest. I asked her not to impose herself on our guests since they are here for silence and prayer. She agreed and said that is what she wanted as well. I told her where I sleep in case she inadvertently locks herself out of her room. Meals times etc. I did not bring up anything about her mental health since she was in denial and would have only caused trouble. When she checked in I asked her to leave an emergency number and it was not negotiable, it was required of us by the fire, and police department, in case of some emergency. I told her I would not use it, unless there was an emergency. I feel strongly for people in her condition. Her life must be a lonely one. So I do not want to push her further into that corner. As long as she respects certain boundaries she is welcome to come here from time to time. If she breaks them, I will with some sorrow, ask her to leave. She will be here until Friday and I will give her some money for food and gas and she will leave. A beautiful child of God back out again in a world that cares little for her plight. Yet I believe that she will always find those who will help in their own limited and little way. Her family is concerned and her son was notified that she was here. In a way, if she were to have a psychotic break, I could call for help and maybe it would help her in the long run. There is so little that can be done with this sort of issue. Yes Christ comes to us in many guises in the people we met. The human heart is a tabernacle where Christ Jesus dwells. Knowing that allows me to be free in seeking to respond in a loving manner, but I have no freedom to write her off, show disdain or to simply ignore her. I wish dealing with people with certain problems was easier, but it isn’t and my limitations sometimes cause frustration. So I do what I can, as little as that it.
