Time for a laugh!

Discussion in 'Coffee House' started by Border collie, Jul 7, 2016.

  1. BrianK

    BrianK Powers Staff Member

    The Perfect Priest

    The results of a computerized survey indicate the perfect priest preaches exactly fifteen minutes. He condemns sins but never upsets anyone. He works from 8:00 AM until midnight and is also a janitor. He makes $50 a week, wears good clothes, buys good books, drives a good car, and gives about $50 weekly to the poor. He is 28 years old and has preached 30 years. He has a burning desire to work with teenagers and spends all of his time with senior citizens.

    The perfect priest smiles all the time with a straight face because he has a sense of humor that keeps him seriously dedicated to his work. He makes 15 calls daily on parish families, shut-ins and the hospitalized, and is always in his office when needed.

    If your priest does not measure up, simply send this letter to six other churches that are tired of their priest, too. Then bundle up your priest and send him to the church on the top of the list. In one week, you will receive 1,643 priests and one of them will be perfect. Have faith in this procedure.

    One parish broke the chain and got its old priest back in less than three weeks.

    From Fr. Z:

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  2. BrianK

    BrianK Powers Staff Member

  3. DesertStar7

    DesertStar7 To Jesus + through Mary @-}--

    Breakfast this morning.

    Decide to add HOT water to boxed pancake mix.

    The batter seized up. :oops: Looks like half-reconstituted instant mashed potatoes. :eek:

    I've still not had coffee ... did I swap boxes by mistake?? :confused: Instant potatoes instead of pancake mix?? :giggle:


    It was pancake mix.

    Entirely ruined by the HOT water and uncookable. :X3:

    Fortunately had just enough pancake mix in the box to make two sizeable pancakes. :coffee:
    Julia and HeavenlyHosts like this.
  4. Muzhik

    Muzhik Powers

    Next time try adding cold milk to the seized batter a little at time and mix thoroughly after each addition until it's thinned enough to pour out onto the griddle.

    (Don't really know it it will work. I'm basing my answer on my experience [fancy talk for "years and years of screwing up"] in recovering from getting distracted while cooking. Catholic Answers Forum closed down at 5PM Pacific Time on Dec. 31, and I was planning on using a function there that would have saved all my posts into a .zip file, thus saving all the cartoons I had posted, except I got so involved with making a new version of chocolate chip cookies I developed from reading a dozen articles on making the BEST chocolate chip cookie, that I didn't think to log into CAF until later and found it was already shut down. Some days I REALLY wish I didn't have ADH ... Look! Fresh chocolate chip cookies! I wonder who made them ...)
  5. AED

    AED Powers

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  6. AED

    AED Powers

    Oh dear. I gave up on pancakes long ago. I only do waffles now. Pancakes are always too brown on the outside and raw on the inside when I make them.
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  7. AED

    AED Powers

    :LOL: I am not laughing at you I am laughing with you. This could be me!!!
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  8. AED

    AED Powers

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  9. BrianK

    BrianK Powers Staff Member

  10. Jo M

    Jo M Powers

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  11. HeavenlyHosts

    HeavenlyHosts Powers

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  12. AED

    AED Powers

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  13. RosaryWielder

    RosaryWielder Away working on a lot of changes in my life.

    Folks, I'm a history-buff and I really like exploring a wide variety of obscure, historical things, especially things related to Biblical and Church History. But now, I've come across something really obscure, so obscure, that I can barely find anything on it. It all started with watching a video from the US Congress, in which a congressman pray used a very ancient and obscure word, "awomen;" apparently it comes from the little-known sister language of Hebrew, Shebrew, and I'm trying to find more information on Shebrew and awoman, but it's very difficult to find stuff.

    Can of you kind folks here provide with any information and resources on this?
    Clare A, Julia, Muzhik and 1 other person like this.
  14. AED

    AED Powers

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  15. any name you wish

    any name you wish Archangels

    It's rumored to be spoken by people who are womantally slow, as Ms. Barnhardt pointed out.
  16. AED

    AED Powers

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  17. Fede

    Fede Archangels

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  18. Fede

    Fede Archangels

    I also love shebrew!!:LOL:
    RosaryWielder likes this.
  19. Pishposh46

    Pishposh46 New Member

    Couldn't help out laugh at this.

    Attached Files:

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  20. Christy1983

    Christy1983 Guest


    Leaked: First Photos of Heaven!

    (I saw this on another site and couldn't resist. I think they are waiting just behind the Gates ;-)
    HeavenlyHosts and DesertStar7 like this.

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