I found this understanding of prayer fascinating: Father Haggerty of the NYC Diocese from the July 2014 issue of Magnificat (p. 49). The law of divine concealment is inescapable in all deeper prayer. No contact with God in prayer, no spiritual experience or encounter, does not quickly hide him again. He manages always to flee. Every spiritual taste and discovery becomes dissatisfying before very long. Every comfort received in prayer is impermanent, every light is temporary. But what is remarkable is that our soul’s desire can remain firm and unyielding, waiting for God to reveal himself, the shadows finally lifted. This may be the most unnoticed grace in prayer: we are drawn back constantly despite every difficulty and frustration. Similarly, the Scriptures express this image of unrelenting thirst for God: From Song of Songs 3: On my bed by night I sought him whom my soul loveth. I sought him and found him not. I will arise and go about the city. In the streets and broadways I sought him whom my soul loveth, but I found him not… I received the great grace of visiting Assisi, Italy and being in the company of Francis and Clare last Friday. In the solitude of San Damiano, Clare long ago missed the increasingly rare conversations with Francis. But I believe her loneliness was of a different form than I originally conceived. Fruitless loneliness is rooted in an inward glance of self-pity where I seek the companionship of others for my own sake. Even so, one may be in the presence of others, yet very much alone. I don't believe that's the loneliness that Clare experienced. Fruitful loneliness is rooted in our longing for God which draws me outside of myself to find God in helping others. Yes, ultimately this longing will only be fully satisfied in the Beatific Vision, but there, too, we will be joined with the angels and saints. Clare missed Francis, but never ceased to intercede for the friars, the citizens of Assisi, or fail to minister to those who made their way to San Damiano. This was a blessing for me. If I can't find God in the silence of my own heart, yet still make room for Him in my day, then I'll be sure to find Him in the needy, lonely and forsaken who cross my path. Thank you, Clare, for providing this insight as I stood in the doorway of the original chapel where the first Poor Clares gathered for prayer- such a God-filled stillness! Safe in the Father's lap!
Wow!1 Lucky, blessed you to be in Assisi, Terry. I am sorry now when I have been out in Italy I did not make the effort and travel more. The Italian trains are great. The spirit of your post reminds me so much of the Song of songs, the lover seeking her beloved. 7 Tell me, O thou whom my soul loveth, where thou feedest, where thou makest thy flock to rest at noon: for why should I be as one that turneth aside by the flocks of thy companions? It is such a mystery why some people should be so consumed by this thirst for God that the quest takes up their whole lives, while others at the merest taste of God should consider themselves satisfied. I would say we should never come away from the banquet of the Lord replete.....that there should always be a hunger. Funny for me it is at evening time , often at twilight this hunger really hits.
