For the past week I have felt an overpowering sense of depression, darkness, and despair. There is no specific problem or event in my life that I can pin it on. Its almost like a foreboding. Any prayers for me and my family would be much appreciated. There is one reputed message from Mary on the LTTW site, dated Nov 30 2012, that right now I find particularly comforting (whether its authentic or not I do not know): "Never despair. Never, never despair. My helps are so great. They are everywhere and at every moment. I always come for you. I am always near to you. I am even within you, always speaking in your heart. Do not turn to the darkness. Turn to me. Do not think about the darkness. Think about me. In this way, I will have power over you, not the darkness. My words are clear enough. Even though the darkness comes, even though you are surrounded by darkness, you must not fear. I am with you with my light and my powerful love."
I will pray for you. I am always just a step away from despair. Please pray for me (and my children) also.
Phillip, I have had similar feelings this week; the sense that dark clouds are gathering and a fretfulness before the storm. But there was something else. On Friday, I woke up out of sorts and stayed that way for several hours. I was prickly, assuming the worst of others, a little jealous (which is foreign to me), dragging my feet in self-involved misery. Finally, I cried out to Jesus, "What is wrong???" I heard the answer, "It's the cross. Would you like My help in carrying it?" Within moments of begging His help, my peace returned and the previous grief was gone. He showed me what I am capable of by myself, and it wasn't pretty. I exhibited every trait I despise in others! I'm determined to remember this lesson, so I don't have to repeat it. This saying of the Chippewa Indians came to mind: "Sometimes I go about pitying myself, when all the while I am carried by great winds across the sky." Lord, preserve me from self-pity!
Philip, these are challenging times for all of us. I will keep you in prayer and perhaps it may help if you turn to the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. "Eternal God, in Whom mercy is endless and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible, look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us so that in difficult moments we might not despair nor become despondent, but with great confidence trust in Your Holy Will, which is Love and Mercy Itself." Peace.
Praying for you both Phillip and Heidi and for all who are faced with darkness. A very great Cross. Again and again I notice Christians facing this it seems almost a constant in the life of the Christian. This darkness has several sources but the one I am most familiar with is the spiritual one of temptations, trials and the Dark Night. My poor father used to suffer periods of deep depression. His voice used to sink very low . He became apathetic and sometimes took to his bed for several days. I recall once when I was about twelve years old he choose me to go away with him for a few days to drive round Ireland with him in an effort to pull himself out of it. My mother said the reason he choose me ..out of all his ten children ....was because I was and am always so happy. I recall how with a kind of desperation he used to listen to my chatter and laughter as though trying to take fire from my joy. I guess this was physical depression the 'Black Dog' that Winston Churchill used to talk about. Then there is the psychological depressions that I feel finds its roots in sins; our own sins or the sins of others even going back several generations. But the last two kinds are spiritual and with these I am more familiar with.The attacks of the devils and the Dark Night of the Soul. I think the attacks of the demons are far and away the most common one for Christians to face. The , 'Slough of despond' mentioned by Bunyan in his great book, 'The Pilgrims Progress'. St Peter mentions that the devil , 1 Peter 5:8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. In many cases souls are easy enough for the devil to hut and drag away to hell. But the good Catholic who practises his or her faith is no easy target. It is a bit like trying to eat steel. One thing though you have to give him credit for he never gives up. If he could he would simply kill us. But God has sent his angels to watch over us, our guardian angels , so that's off the board. So if all he could ever do, I fotenthink is to put a pimple on the end of our nose ..a pimple on the end of our nose is what we would have. He can do more than this and one of his tools is to attack us with negativity. TO enshroud us with grey deep clouds of sadness. ...and what to do? First to continue our own prayer life and sacraments. Just a normal. If the devil sees we are stopping this he will redouble his efforts as we are giving him something to eat. However it may be good to jazz thing sup a little, reading new spiritual books, going to mass at a different time in another church, seeking new spiritual company. Also looking for human aids, if you like a drink have a drink with good cheerful company, go to a movie or a show take a holiday whatever, ,,use your wits. Fight it, don't lie down under it. Recall the devil is like a dog on a tight leash and is only allowed so much room in all this. 1 Peter 1:6-7: "In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which perishes, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ."
One thing I notcie about the devil is tha when he is at this you can hear him quite easily if you pay attention. He sets up at cnstant negative drone to get you dwon.
he has bothered me since I was a little girl. I grew up in an atheist home and don't recall being taught anything about him, but I knew anyway, from experience. Too often I let him get to me.
Boy I know that drone so well. Its just lately that I fight it with all I have. I have slid into the darkness and self pity once to often and then taken it out on others because I didn't understand it --and then when I slowly saw the light I was overcome with sadness at what havoc I had wrought and had to spend ENDLESS hours apologizing and cleaning up my mess. God forgive me! I have found if I just cry it out and cry out to our Blessed Mother and pray for the person who rejected me etc. I gain some peace. Then sleep on it and when I wake I offer all to the Divine Will and the betterment of that person's sanctity or to change that person's heart; I find that I have more peace and calm. I know this because that is what I did last night and today I get to go to Mass and pray some more. What a lovely feast day! God be praised for His Mother!! Pray for us Mother who have recourse to thee!
Padraig: You are right about how the most common is the manifestation of these attacks. And given the tight leash, the attacks are cunning, often involving others close to us as well, playing on our desire to love and be loved, yet always diminishing that love to something temporal, attacking the hearts made anew in purity by the holy spirit for perfection of self-sacrificial love. Popular music, nostalgic feelings of youth, movies, advertising..... so many visuals these days with over-exposure to media stimulation as well....... carrying it around even in our pockets these days. One way I try to combat is to always overwhelm my media sources with holy examples (favorite catholic web links, tv networks, and even phone apps....like the Divine Mercy app that you can put on your phone from the Marians of the Immaculate Conception which allows you to meditate on the image anytime or read excerpts from the diary). And also to avoid outlets that tend to focus on self or ego (like Facebook for most people).
my prayers to Phillip and Heidi. when going through a tough time or dark time, it is important to not isolate yourself. I heard on EWTN Fr. Calloway give a talk once and he said (I'm paraphrasing) not to isolate yourself, because when you do that the devil will kick your ass every time. Given I used to live by myself, I can attest that this is true. Be sure to surround yourself with people or projects or reading or something if you are going through a tough time.
St Phillip the apostle of our Lord...your name sake needs your attention and aid...help him overcome the night...in Jesus's name ...Amen. Phillip if you have not done so...consecrate your life to St Phillip and ask his intercession...he will promptly intercede for you. As one of the apostles of the Lord he surely knew the hour of darkness well enough.
